It's been eight months since I left my ex-husband. Only a few months really, but so much healing has happened in my life in that short amount of time. I posted a while back about the biggest difference between now and then being hope. That's still true. I used to be so stuck, and now I can dream and see so many possibilities for my life. Recently my mom and I went to my former town for the weekend. I was able to attend church where I attended for 5 1/2 years. I saw friends that I have been missing. It really was a good time! I've mentioned before that before I left I really had a hard time keeping myself together. I was constantly on the verge of tears. I'm sure anyone who wasn't oblivious could see it. That's why it was good to hear a couple of the comments that weekend from some of the people that I used to go to church with. One lady told me I was beautiful. I know we usually think of beauty as clear skin, straight teeth, stylish clothes, and carefully-...

A few days ago I was in my former town and was able to see so many friends. It was amazing! I think people were able to see that a lot of healing has happened in my life;  I'm way different from how I was when I left. That caused me to start thinking about my healing process and consider what the things may be that have helped me along the way. When I left I KNEW I was making the right decision. That gave me a peace, even though my life was upside down. I definitely could have left sooner, and I had plenty of reason to, but I waited until I knew it was absolutely the right choice. Because of this, I've never looked back or doubted my path.  My support has been incredible. I know I've mentioned things in this regard before, but I've always had people who have had my back. When I needed someone to talk to, when I needed help moving, when I needed a hug, there was always someone. I'll always be grateful.  I told myself the truth about myself and my situation. ...

You may be wondering how I'm really doing, so I wanted to post this letter and let you know. It's occurred to me that it would be natural for you to think of me as being really sad because that's how I was when you last saw me. Every day was a battle, and at times it was so hard to keep my tears at bay. Sometimes I couldn't keep them at bay. Now things are different. I have so much hope for the future. I have a smile on my face. I don't walk around with tears just waiting to be shed. I'm in such a good place for this time in my life;  it's so good to be with my family. I definitely have some healing to do, and I have to be patient with that process. But the church family here has wrapped their arms around me and stood with me like you did when I was there. (I still feel your arms from a distance <3) It's a little hard to know how much of this to go into because there are wonderful people that I really don't want to hurt. But I didn't ...

Leaving my husband is probably the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. There is a lot I'm not ready to talk about publicly, but I knew for a while that separation was coming. I hoped my husband would be the one to decide he had had enough and break things off;  I didn't want to be the one to make that hard decision. But an evening came when I realized I couldn't take it anymore. One last thing happened that reinforced what I already knew had to happen eventually. I was really upset that night. I made my decision, but I was afraid that as time went by I would change my mind. I texted one of my best friends and told her I was leaving. Then the next day I told my parents, my brother, and another best friend. These people were my safety net. If I decided to back out in the coming days or weeks, they were to hold me accountable and make sure I followed through with my decision because at that time I still didn't want to leave. I just knew I HAD to. The e...