It's been eight months since I left my ex-husband. Only a few months really, but so much healing has happened in my life in that short amount of time. I posted a while back about the biggest difference between now and then being hope. That's still true. I used to be so stuck, and now I can dream and see so many possibilities for my life. Recently my mom and I went to my former town for the weekend. I was able to attend church where I attended for 5 1/2 years. I saw friends that I have been missing. It really was a good time! I've mentioned before that before I left I really had a hard time keeping myself together. I was constantly on the verge of tears. I'm sure anyone who wasn't oblivious could see it. That's why it was good to hear a couple of the comments that weekend from some of the people that I used to go to church with. One lady told me I was beautiful. I know we usually think of beauty as clear skin, straight teeth, stylish clothes, and carefully-...

Sometimes people wrong us, and in the process, they steal something from us that's very precious. Thankfully it's not always like that, but life can get pretty messy sometimes. It can be tempting to just gloss over that loss and not really acknowledge it. It may even feel like you are forgiving the person if you do that. But this is just a form of denial, and it's not healthy. Before this year is over, 10 babies will have been born in my former church congregation. At age 34 I'm very aware that I'll never be a mother unless I happen to remarry and the man has kids already. And if I'm ever a step-mom, my hypothetical stepkids will probably be in their teens at least, because this certainly wouldn't be happening soon. Now those who know me well know that I've never longed to be a mother like a lot of women. No baby fever for me. But to have that choice taken away? Well, I guess you can say I still had a choice. But how could I choose to bring an innoc...