There are many things that are different, now that I have left my husband. I  live in a different part of the state. I live with my parents again until I can get some things figured out financially. I'm attending the church I attended before moving away when I got married, but there is a new pastor now. I no longer have the security a wife has (or should have) of someone taking care of her. I know my family will take care of me, and my church will. No one will ever let me be without things I need. I'm driving an old Toyota I've had forever, because my husband got to keep the newer car. I wouldn't have wanted to bring the payments with me, along with the newer car, so there is that. I loved my role as a full-time housekeeper/cook/domestic goddess when I was with my husband. When I left, I knew I would have to polish up my resume and find employment. At this point I've only had temporary jobs, but something will open up. It's not easy reinventing myself.

Have you ever read the article   "Drowning Doesn't Look Like Drowning"   by Mario Vittone? He is very qualified to write on the subject. He was in the Coast Guard with a career in a helicopter rescue. The idea of his article is that we think drowning is going to be dramatic, with a lot of flailing around. Something that would really catch your attention if you happen to be nearby. But there are physical things going on with a drowning person that don't allow him to call out for help or wave for attention. That makes it so scary, because a child can drown just feet away from you, and you would never know until it's too late. This is a really good reminder going into summer. With pool parties, trips to the lake, and beach days, we just can't be too careful. But as I read these warnings about drowning recently, it struck me that this can really apply to more than just the physical realm. Have you ever felt like you were drowning inside, and no one seemed

A few days ago I was in my former town and was able to see so many friends. It was amazing! I think people were able to see that a lot of healing has happened in my life;  I'm way different from how I was when I left. That caused me to start thinking about my healing process and consider what the things may be that have helped me along the way. When I left I KNEW I was making the right decision. That gave me a peace, even though my life was upside down. I definitely could have left sooner, and I had plenty of reason to, but I waited until I knew it was absolutely the right choice. Because of this, I've never looked back or doubted my path.  My support has been incredible. I know I've mentioned things in this regard before, but I've always had people who have had my back. When I needed someone to talk to, when I needed help moving, when I needed a hug, there was always someone. I'll always be grateful.  I told myself the truth about myself and my situation.

Sometimes people wrong us, and in the process, they steal something from us that's very precious. Thankfully it's not always like that, but life can get pretty messy sometimes. It can be tempting to just gloss over that loss and not really acknowledge it. It may even feel like you are forgiving the person if you do that. But this is just a form of denial, and it's not healthy. Before this year is over, 10 babies will have been born in my former church congregation. At age 34 I'm very aware that I'll never be a mother unless I happen to remarry and the man has kids already. And if I'm ever a step-mom, my hypothetical stepkids will probably be in their teens at least, because this certainly wouldn't be happening soon. Now those who know me well know that I've never longed to be a mother like a lot of women. No baby fever for me. But to have that choice taken away? Well, I guess you can say I still had a choice. But how could I choose to bring an innoc

The past few days have been so crazy that I haven't been able to get my thoughts together about another thought-provoking post. I decided to share a recipe that's appropriate for going into BBQ season. I hope you enjoy it! Spinach and Tortellini Salad INGREDIENTS 1 9-oz. package cheese tortellini 1 10-oz. package frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained 1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese 2 cups cherry tomatoes, halved 1 2-oz. can sliced black olives 1 8-oz. bottle Italian salad dressing DIRECTIONS 1.  Cook tortellini according to package directions. Rinse under cold water and drain. 2.  In a large bowl, combine the tortellini, spinach, cheese, tomatoes, and olives. Toss with Italian dressing and season with salt and pepper. Enjoy! This recipe is from Lil' Luna